Tuesday January 06, 2009
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Your roommate may have an accent that grates on your nerves, but that's not something you can ask a person to change. It's also not fair to expect someone to change his entire personality to suit you. It would be great if we could snap our fingers, and BAM, instant personality makeover! Not gonna happen. So, you need to separate personality traits from irritating habits. You won't transform your roommate into your new best friend, but you can make things a lot more bearable. Here are a few ideas:
Talk. If something's bugging you, bring it up in a non-defensive way rather than assume your roommate can read your mind. Nothing can change unless you acknowledge it. It's possible that your roommate may not even be aware of the problem.
Focus on behavior, not personality. It's not reasonable to ask people to change who they are, but you can ask them to tone down how they express themselves, especially when it's invading your turf. So, you can't criticize someone for being "perky," but you can ask for someone not to talk so much while you're studying.
Stay flexible. It's not your job to fix anybody else, and it helps to recognize that no one is perfect. Be willing to look at your own behavior. Consider what you could do differently to help the situation instead of only blaming your roommate.
Start with one pet peeve. What can you absolutely not deal with? What do you find extremely irritating, but could live with if you had to? There are probably tons of things your roommate does that get on your nerves. But nothing kills a relationship faster than listing dozens of reasons why you don't like a person. Instead, both of you need to list your number one pet peeve and focus your energy on solving that first.
Consider the positives. Before you decide that life would be better with a roommate exactly like you, think of what you could gain by living with your opposite. We're often attracted to people who are different from us because they represent qualities we wish we possessed. If you're shy, maybe being around a more outgoing person will force you out of your shell. When one person's strength makes up for the other's weakness, being opposites is an advantage.
Susan Fee is a licensed counselor and author of the college survival guide, My Roommate Is Driving Me Crazy! Solve Conflicts, Set Boundaries, and Survive the College Roommate from Hell (Adams Media). More college survival tips are listed on her site, www.myroommateisdrivingmecrazy.com
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College Admissions Essays that Take 1st Place -A Personal Statement Checklist
While the application and entry process is exciting, it is also rigorously demanding? when it comes to writing the prompted essays. But instead of getting intimidated, remember, it is a process with a series of many laps around the track. Do the steps one at a time, on time, and even ahead of time; be just as rigorous as the entry requirements are; and use the following as a checklist throughout the entire personal statement writing process, and you will create a worthy piece of writing that will smoothly slide you right into the institution of your choice.
An Education in Saving on Textbooks
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How To Improve Your Study Habits and Remember Better
If you're like most students, you put off studying until the very last minute. The night before the exam, you'll stay up all night cramming, getting little or no sleep. In the morning, you'll drag yourself out of bed, psych yourself up with lots of coffee and some cigarettes, and go into the exam feeling exhausted, drained and jittery all at the same time. You'll find it hard to focus or think, and you'll be cursing yourself for not starting to study sooner.
Why Pursue Your Degree Online?
Initially called 'correspondence courses,' these programs were created to provide primary and secondary education to students living in remote areas. These programs were expanded to include higher education and, with the advent of the internet, students can now work with their instructors via email, videophone, or web conferencing.
Break it up, Break it Down: Paragraphing Strategies for College Essays
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Secrets Of Successfully Sitting Exams
As students, we often complain about the examination system. That is usually because we feel the pressure of an uncertain outcome. But like all systems we need to understand its mechanics in order to make it work for us.
Distance Learning Degree Program - How to Study
Most colleges offer support for new students. Some schools may have orientation sessions at the start of a new semester. If your school offers this, plan on attending. You will gain valuable information about the structure of the course and the technology used. Instructors often give advice for organizing your time at these sessions. In addition, you will get a feel for the teacher's expectations. Most schools offer tutorials to help you learn to use the online classroom and other software used in distance learning programs.